Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Overwhelmed But Loved...

Adoption can be nuts sometimes. And I ain't gonna lie - it can just get emotionally overwhelming. To the point where I start to feel like I am looking like this all the time...

Mostly cuz of this wait. It can be maddening at times. And if you're not careful, your mind can start to do some crazy things... like start wandering and then ya start wondering dumb things like:

"Come on God... what did I do? Why am I experiencing this wait?"
As if I could do something to gain or lose favor with God... I know, I know. We really know the right answers... I swear we do.

So today I heard these lyrics from Lecrae while driving home. I have heard them a million times but they really spoke to me today:
"You can't win playing heart games
But I love you even when your light's off in your dark shame
When you lay down and profane me
Or when your bloodstream contains the things that would defame me
When nobody knows that you claim me
Or when you mess your life up, get mad, and want to blame me
I still want you back, I won't punish you
I took that on the cross because I wanted you
I might discipline and chastise
But if you got what you deserved you'd be in hell with other bad guys..."
It really hit me just how loved we are. That right there - that is LOVE like no other.

So yeah - we are surely overwhelmed by this wait to bring our girl home. But we are loved so much more than that.

We are choosing to focus on the love not the wait!


Frank M. Teabo said...

I understand,Adoption is hard for me to understand why kids don't act like they are suppose to when they are home with us.
I have to check myself all the time.

emily said...

Love you guys so much. Even if M is wearing a Yankees shirt. :)

Shari U said...

I thought I might go absolutely crazy during our adoption wait. It's just so hard having no control over the time line and waiting on others to make decisions and to get lines moving. Our entire process was only 18 months though from application to being home from China. (I know, I know). I can't imagine being in your situation, but I'm praying for your girl and hoping you'll get to here very, very soon.