Friday, June 13, 2014

How To Father, When A Father Didn't Bother...


How To Father When Your Father Didn't Bother
as this time of year, draws near, every year,
I try to steer clear, cuz I'm filled up with fear;

A fear that I'll fail at the best job that I've had,
Not designing, not web dev - but my job as a dad.

See that fear that I'll fail is rooted deep down within,
Cuz the one who should have trained me didn't focus on Him;

As a kid - to be fair - well I guess he was there,
But just being there doesn't mean that you care;

Cuz he didn't show love, and he led with no focus,
And without Him at center, well that sorta just broke us;

It broke mom, it broke sisters and it broke me down too,
It broke spirit, broke heart, made what's false seem like true;

Yeah he fed us and housed us but showed us no Jesus,
That's a fail - cuz as kids - man you KNOW that we need this;

So we lived and we lied and we passed on through time,
And this "leader" did things I can't even put in rhyme;

I grew older and colder with a chip on my shoulder,
Looked at life like a soldier - my anger just smoldered;

I only cared about me - and with that - just barely,
I was angry at God for being "treated unfairly"

I was mad at a God that I didn't even heed,
A God I didn't love, one I thought I didn't need;

The truth, though, is that I was built just to know Him,
But I said "I hate Him, you know what? I'll show Him!"

"I won't do as He says, I will never have kids,
I can't cuz I'm broken from the the things my dad did;"


But then, 10 years later - through a friend and a wife,
God grabbed hold of my heart and redirected my life;

And now - here I sit - as a family of six,
It's amazing - if you let Him - just what God can fix;

In awe is where I stand, as His muscles He flexed them,
He gave me insight so I could answer this question:

How can I father when my father didn't bother?
I father cuz our Father had love like no other.

And it's THAT line right there that has changed my cold stare,
turned a heart that was hateful into one full of care;

And allows me to scream what I'd never bother to say,
I hope all you dads out there have a great Father's Day.

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