Sunday, June 26, 2016

Here's a Skinnier Brush... Paint With It Instead


A month and a half or so ago I found myself in a conversation - primarily about adoption - but life in general too - and this comment was made:

"Well... if it was all as happy and joyful as Tymm's Facebook or blog makes it seem then everybody would do it..."
I kinda "ha ha ha'd" it off at first but then...

That comment has kinda stuck with me.

And it bothered me.

Was I being kinda "Fake Happy" on social media? Man... I hoped not.

So I did an audit... and honestly - it has me thinking of some Jay Z lyrics:
"Say that I'm foolish I only talk about jewels (bling bling),
Do you fools listen to music or do you just skim through it?"
I mean seriously - have ya read our blog? Pretty sure we're downright open...

I mean - we were pretty straight forward about how sucky it was when Brighton died and then multiple times afterwards as we hit his anniversaries again and again...

Or that time Meron was being groomed for GOD KNOWS WHAT...

Or stress related body heat...

Or indiscriminate friendliness...

Or when talking to our kids from broken backgrounds is broken and hard...

Or my jacked up lack of relationship with my own parents...

Or my deathly fears when Laura was staring down something growing inside her...

Or racism. Or name calling. Or discipline. Or hard parenting crap. Or...

I could go on and on and on...

So then I decided to check Facebook. And same thing... I feel like I'm a pretty straight shooter. To the point of ticking some people off and losing some "friends."

So - after wracking my brain - the only thing I could surmise was this...

Sometimes - people paint other peoples' lives with the big, fat, broad brushes of their own lives.

We may have some similarities in life - and you may have a challenge or two - and so you just assume we have that same challenge and don't talk about it.

Stop ASS-uming you silly ASS-umers.


And just stop painting with gigantic brush strokes!

I mean - what if the only thing we have in common is that we have nothing in common?

It could be the case...

Or... should I post more things like this?


Piles and piles of clothes - never to be put away ever - just moved from location to location... IMPERFECTION AT ITS BEST!

Would that make us all feel better?


Or my forever unfinished sidewalk project on the side of the house?

Dad/Homeowner failure in the flesh!

Or how about this one...


Stacks of dirty dishes... always around!

There - is that better?

Or should I talk about my lack of self esteem?

Or failures as a husband? And as a dad? And as a son?

Would that be more palatable for the masses?

Or maybe... just maybe... you could take this...


That's a skinnier, narrower brush so you can stop broadly dipping your brush in your own life and painting ours with it.

That might clear it all up right there...

Because ya know what? The truth of the matter is this: We Keep It Real.


There's no faking going on around here - not in social media land and not in our camp in real life.

We're the same every where - at least we try hard to be.

And maybe - just maybe - our life looks overwhelmingly positive because... it IS overwhelmingly positive.

And I bet yours is too.

The real question is this - what are you choosing to focus on?

Are you allowing the 5% of your funk to become 100% of your junk?

Are you allowing 20 minutes of a bad day to ruin the other 1,420 minutes ya get each day?

Or are you CHOOSING to embrace the positive, the awesome, the incredible, the glorious... the HIM in every day?


Look - we're not perfect. We're FAR from it.

And come talk with me - I will give ya the goods, the bads and how HE has shown up in each of them...

But we'll also tell you that life is not bad. You may like to think it is - and Lord knows it probably gets more clicks, likes, shares and comments when it seems bad...

But the truth is... the icky crap that happens - it is far outweighed by the amazing fact that we wake up every day and get to live life - even bad things - we get to experience that - cuz we're ALIVE.

We choose the voice and tone and personality of our family - both in real life and online.

And for this camp... we're choosing to be REAL but stay POSITIVE... because the fact is...

#LifeISGood

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